Coronavirus: How Covid has changed the ‘big fat Indian wedding’. India’s richest family caps year of big fat weddings. A new Netflix show, Indian Matchmaking, has created a huge buzz in India, but many can’t seem to agree if it is regressive and cringe-worthy or honest and realistic, writes the BBC’s Geeta Pandey in Delhi. The eight-part docuseries features elite Indian matchmaker Sima Taparia as she goes about trying to find suitable matches for her wealthy clients in India and the US. In the series, she’s seen jet-setting around Delhi, Mumbai and several American cities, meeting prospective brides and grooms to find out what they are looking for in a life partner. Since its release nearly two weeks back, Indian Matchmaking has raced to the top of the charts for Netflix in India. It has also become a massive social phenomenon. Hundreds of memes and jokes have been shared on social media: some say they are loving it, some say they are hating it, some say they are “hate-watching” it, but it seems almost everyone is watching it.
Netflix series Indian Matchmaking is this year’s scariest horror story about arranged marriages
On Netflix’s “Indian Matchmaking,” marriage consultant Sima Taparia travels the world to meet with hopeful clients and help them find the perfect match for an arranged marriage. The format of the show is simple. Hopeful brides- and grooms-to-be meet with Taparia — often with their overbearing parents in tow — for an initial consultation. Criteria are laid out, potential suitors are presented on paper, dates are arranged, and then it’s up to the couple to decide if it’s a match.
In some respects, the producers should be commended. This is a show that turns away from the “big fat Indian wedding” trope and offers something fresh: a look at how some traditional-facing couples meet through the services of a professional matchmaker.
Adam Rippon Loved Sally Field’s ‘Bold’ Matchmaking Attempt. And the Olympic skater sent a sweet message to the actress’ son. By. Elyse Wanshel.
With his team of relationship managers, counsellors, photographers, chartered accountants and a sophisticated software that helps sort out matches based on location, community, age and height, among other filters, Goswami found a life partner for the year-old that checked all the boxes. I met a lot of people and my family stepped in only when I was sure. Read The evolution of marriage, from strictly arranged to semi-arranged. But I dated my wife for a year before the wedding.
They run background checks, match horoscopes, caste and family wealth, and even discuss prickly subjects like dowry. Many of these stages of Indian matchmaking and the misogyny, casteism and sexism that they sometimes reveal recently found a global audience through an eight-part series on Netflix. The show was panned as regressive, but does it hold a mirror to the modern matchmaker? An MBA, he started the service after struggling to find a partner for himself.
Then, we meet the families in person, take a detailed note of their requirements — parents and children separately. We visit their homes and properties and take pictures. We also talk to their neighbours, friends and colleagues and get written references.
Sushmita Pathak. Is it a match? A potential couple meet up courtesy of a matchmaker in the Netflix series Indian Matchmaking. Netflix hide caption.
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Netflix Inc. has hit the sweet spot with a controversial reality series on a globe-trotting Indian matchmaker helping her picky clients find life.
Indian Matchmaking treads into dangerous territory when it allows Sima Taparia free rein to reinforce regressive methods of Indian matchmaking as undeniable fact. During the episode, Basra explained to Justin how she might have rushed into marriage, in part due to her Indian family pressuring her. How could I ever trust you? How could anyone ever trust you? The idea is very much to translate the aspirations, insecurities, and fixations of a community for a global audience unfamiliar with its beats.
The trouble is, over the course of eight abruptly structured episodes, Indian Matchmaking becomes an infuriating exercise in delusion, ending up doing exactly what it intended to rally against: exoticising a calculated, cultural practice that in reality is steeped in decades of misogyny, casteism, and gender inequality. Her clientele, atleast the ones who feature on the show, seem to be exclusively upper-class and wealthy — a majority of them are in fact, non-resident Indians.
By focusing only on these one-percenters, Indian Matchmaking, at the outset, makes the choice to remain blind to the realities of India, limiting its scope to a version of arranged marriage that is heavily sanitised and often comes with no real repercussions. That in itself is a comically low-stakes predicament in a country where resistance to arranged marriage usually leads to caste-based atrocities, honour killing, and rampant violence against women.
Although, the privilege of her clients imply that she is expensive, the unanswered questions — Does she charge by the hour? Does she offer personalised packages?
Subscriber Account active since. This is how I feel all the time with these stupid apps. James Charneco, 27, deleted his dating apps.
A Netflix hit about arranged marriages reflects Indian society a lot more than critics want to admit.
More and more Japanese parents are attending matchmaking parties in an effort to marry off their children, worried that they will be part of the growing segment of the population that never ties the knot. Although matchmaking for political or financial reasons was common in Japan’s millennials are apathetic about romance, and everyone knows it. But according to Hirokazu Nakamura, chief product officer and chief marketing officer of Tokyo-based startup Eureka Inc.
More than 50 percent of local governments in Japan are supporting single men and women through matchmaking and marriage seminars to help them get married, a recent Kyodo News survey showed, highlighting public efforts to curb the nation’s dwindling birthrate and depopulation. The survey released Masanobu Ota, a farmer in Ureshino, Saga Prefecture, and his wife Etsuko, married last year thanks to the help of a matchmaker — the prefectural government.
Masanobu, 28, met Etsuko, 38, at a konkatsu spouse-hunting event held by the Saga Prefectural Government in November
Matchmaking illustrates the ills of Indian society | Opinion
Five years ago, I met with a matchmaker. I went in scornful. Like many of my progressive South Asian peers, I denounced arranged marriage as offensive and regressive. But when the matchmaker recited her lengthy questionnaire, I grasped, if just for a beat, why people did things this way.
On Netflix’s “Indian Matchmaking,” marriage consultant Sima Taparia travels the world to meet with hopeful clients and help them find the.
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In Defense of Aparna From ‘Indian Matchmaking’
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Netflix’s new hit ‘Indian Matchmaking‘ misses the full story on arranged marriage. Pundit This article has been updated. It’s common to see.
These are just some of the things several South Asian women say they have been told by their families and matchmakers who have tried to arrange their marriage with a series of prospective suitors. Religion, caste, and class compatibility are often given importance within the practice. It is challenging, and likely impossible, to condense and critically evaluate how arranged marriages work across the South Asian subcontinent within the format of one article or TV show.
One of the major drawbacks of Indian Matchmaking, critics say, is that it focuses on matchmaking within the selective bubble of mostly wealthy, upper-caste North Indian Hindus, and uncritically normalizes many aspects of a deeply complex system. It has also prompted several South Asian women to share their own problematic, and at times traumatic, experiences with the process. BuzzFeed News collected anecdotes from women who documented their experiences on social media as well as from interviews with South Asian women who shared their own stories and critiques.
Her parents began setting her up with matches as soon as Gururaja returned to India in after finishing college in the US. Gururaja said she encountered several microaggressions, subtle sexism, and a lot of anti-gay prejudice during these meetings. There were also a lot of inherent assumptions that she would move wherever the man lived, she said, and her own education and career goals were constantly dismissed. The two professional matchmakers featured on the show advise their women clients to learn to compromise on their own ambitions and dreams for the sake of a good suitor.
When she told them she wanted her partner’s politics to align with her own, she said, her parents dismissed it as unimportant.
How modern Indian matchmakers find partners for the young and the rich
To her surprise, the year-old met her future husband and is set to get married in January next year. Mumbai-based Anindita Dey—married for over a year now — also met her husband through her parents. However, Anindita makes it clear that while it was her parents who set up the meeting, the final decision was completely hers.
Like any great reality show, Indian Matchmaking has a well-defined cast of characters. There are heroes (Vyasar, the sweet Austin.
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Indian Matchmaking: The ‘cringe-worthy’ Netflix show that is a huge hit
This copy is for your personal non-commercial use only. I grew up always expecting an arranged marriage. Several happy couples I knew were introduced by their families, and my own Pakistani parents met for the first time on their wedding day.
The rhetoric of modernity, education, and progress is a powerful one that deludes us into thinking that regressive and repressive aspects of match-making are either a thing of the past, the rural, or the uneducated and uninformed. Denting this urban self-fashioning is the Netflix series Indian Matchmaking , which has held up a mirror to Indian society.
Rather, it has shown how casteism and sexism merge with money, high-status, and modernity in the urban milieus of Mumbai, Delhi, New York, and Chicago. Crucially, they consider their role as not limited to suggesting matches but of also undertaking a maternalistic paternalistic approach by advising prospective brides and grooms to change their attitudes and expectations in order to have a happy married life.
Most important, this series has brought attention to an oft-repeated woe that the onus of sustaining the marriage squarely falls on women. That is the value we have been brought up with. Prospective grooms, on the other hand, are disconcertingly presented as reluctant men, who are to be cajoled and emotionally manipulated by their mothers, sisters into even agreeing to meet a prospective bride.